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24 Funny Quotes About Cleaning

Cleaning is no laughing matter. But maybe it should be. Humor is always good. Before you start cleaning, enjoy these funny quotes. Reading funny quotes may not clean your house, but at least you can have a few laughs. And who knows, maybe you will feel slightly motivated to get up and clean.

Funny Quotes About Cleaning

"I have discovered the secret to a clean house: never let your children or husband enter it."

"Instead of cleaning the house, I just watch an episode of Hoarders and think, "well my house looks great!"


"I feel like I should clean the house, so I'm going to lay down and nap until the feeling passes."


"Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing."

Phyllis Diller

"I make no secret of the fact that I would rather lie on a sofa than sweep beneath it." – Shirley Conran

"Our house is clean enough to be healthy, and dirty enough to be happy."

"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?" – Erma Bombeck

"Nothing inspires cleanliness more than an unexpected guest." – Radhika Mundra

"We dream of having a clean house — but who dreams of actually doing the cleaning?" -Marcus Buckingham

"You never know what you have, until you clean your closet." -Unknown

"I get more cleaning done in the 10 minutes before someone comes over than I do in a week." -Unknown

"Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it." – Evan Esar

"A clean house is a sign of no Internet connection. Unknown

And the true, short story of every parent: "My house was clean. Then the kids woke up. The end." Unknown

"Housework can't kill you but why take a chance." – Phyllis Diller

"The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner." – Roseanne Barr

"I get more cleaning done in the 10 minutes before someone comes over than I do in a week."

"I'm eighteen years behind in my ironing. There's no use doing it now, it doesn't fit anybody I know." — Phyllis Diller

"Housekeeping ain't no joke." —Louisa May Alcott

"Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos."

"First rule of house cleaning while listening to music: the toilet brush is never the microphone."

"You know that amazing feeling when you go to bed knowing your entire house is clean? Ya, neither do I."

"I don't care about Disney lying about my prince charming. I'm more upset about forest creatures and their unwillingness to clean my house."

"I'm going to start cleaning my house. And by cleaning, I mean drinking wine and spraying everything with Febreze."

I hope you found a few of these quotes funny. Are you ready to jump up and get cleaning? Probably not, huh?


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